Rehab 2 (cont)

My time in rehab was very surreal. I felt shitty but and insecure as hell but I always had to put on a tough act. Everyone was so hardcore. I bought it. I never thought that maybe everyone else was just as nervous or scared as I was. My first roommate was a half mexican half black guy named Roman. Now Roman really wasn't nervous. He was very intimidating at first. He was about 5'10" 235 lbs. with a shaved head and the big thick goatee. He looked like a bouncer at a bar. He was the type of guy who would say anything at anytime to anyone. Roman was from Oxnard CA. and claimed to be a gang banger. I believed him. He was a heroin addict. He had shot up every vain in his body from his head to his toes. He never wore a shirt and he had huge lumps all over his shoulders and arms. He had a huge one on his left biceps that was totally disgusting. It was all pussey and it really smelled like crap. Ed told me that they picked Roman up off the street to bring him in. He hadn't showered in weeks and only had the clothes on his back. I gave him some sweat pants and a t-shirt, I think he wore them for two weeks straight. He wouldn't tell me who was paying for his treatment but he didn't have enough to pay for the medical detox at the hell hospital. Roman was in a bad way, he was hurting. He always could make me feel a little better about myself. Neither of us could sleep so we would always stay up all night talking. Roman was loving it at Narconon, it was the best place he had ever lived. There were people hanging out in the detox area 24/7. So I would occasionally go down there in the middle of the night. One of the counselors would get some natural remedy that was supposed to help with sleep and give it to me. I usually wouldn't hang out in detox too long. They all seemed to be friends down there and I didn't know them and I felt like I was intruding. So I would get their little sleep cocktail and go back up to baby sit Roman for them. Roman had a really rough life. You have probably heard the story before. Alcoholic mother, Dad that beat the shit out of him and left when he was 14 yrs old. I asked him what was with all those great big lumps all over his body. They were muscle hits. He would have a loaded rig with heroin and not be able to find a vein. He wasn't exactly skinny, so he would get frustrated and just slam it into his body. Not good. I never knew that. Roman could have told me anything and I would have believed it, I was new to all this stuff. Roman and I were on the second floor because detox was all full. It was all full of new patient and the large back room had become a new women student room. It was just overcrowded.
After a week or so I got to know the group of people I was in detox with. I realized I was going to be with them the whole time. It was quite a group. Beside Roman there was Danny;tweaker from Vegas, Joyce;Alcohol/cocaine who was a hooters girl from San Diego, Brian;heroin(mostly) he was only 18 from San Clemente, Enrique;tweaker from Phoenix, Samantha; heroin she was a hippie from all over,Jeff; speedballs he was a UCLA grad from LA, Lindsay;cocaine/alcohol was only 20 and from Pittsburgh, plus a few others. There was also a ton of people who were already in the program that I hadn't even met at this point. I would only see them at meal time. I also had some real good friends that came in after I did. One of my best friends came in about one month after me, his name was Sal from San Diego. He was also a pain pill addict.
Once I got out of detox I stayed in the same room since I was already on the second floor. However, I finally got a new roommate. It was Enrique. I was so glad to see Roman go. I will tell you the story of how I got rid of him in the next log perhaps. Enrique didn't speak too much english, well his english wasn't too good I should say. But he was a real cool guy. We got to be good friends. My first friend there was probably the young guy Brian. I used to sit in detox or go on walks with him and Danny and listen to their stories and just be in awe. They were unbelievable some of the stuff these guys had done and been through. Roman would always tell some bullshit story to try to top theirs but half the time you knew he was full of shit. Enrique would usually come along on our walks and just listen and keep to himself. I would rarely tell any stories I would just keep them talking and ask questions to get more out of them. I don't know if they were telling the truth or not, but it was a very entertaining way to pass the time while in detox. For the most part I could believe what most of the people in there told me with the exception of a few people. You can always tell who the braggers are that just want to top all the stories they hear. Some guys just want to be the baddest dudes around, I really didn't care too much about being a bad ass at this point. I just wanted to go home.
During detox we walked over to 7/11 quite a bit. I came to Narc. with only about $30 in my pocket and I bought a meal on the way over the hospital with Ed. I didn't really want that meal, I didn't have much of an appetite, I just got it because I was with Ed. Now I was really regreting that meal. I was almost out of money. That also meant that I would be out of chewing tobacco. I was really relying more and more on my stupid chew. I didn't want to ask my folks for money because they were paying for the rehab and I already felt guilty about that and my soon to be ex-wife sure as hell wasn't going to put any money on my books. I was the only one in the place without any money. Well me and Roman that is.
That is all for now.
peace